The following are the types of beer you're most likely to encounter during your stay in Germany. Perhaps you should sample them all?! I have--and just look at me!
Export
- a fizzy, irritating beer like one of those awful lagers you get from Spar that costs about 30p a bottle. To order:"Eine halbe, bitte"This means you want half a litre (500ml) of this mingin' crap. To get a smaller measure--and thus, possibly manage to finish it before you vomit--say:"Ein kleines Export, bitte"
Hefe Weizen
- Hefe means yeast, Weizen means wheat, so you can probably guess what this is all about: wheaty, yeasty beer. Comes in three flavours:
Warning: headaches and evil hangovers can be the by-product of these tasty, but dirty beers. Also available, for the brave among you, are 'flavoured' versions of the Weizen:
- Dunkel (dark) : "Ein dunkeles Hefe, bitte"
- Normal (normal): "Ein normales Hefe, bitte"
- Hell (light): "Ein helles Hefe, bitte"
Banane-Weizen (banana flavoured), Cola-Weizen (a cola/hefe shandy), Radler (shandy), Kirsche-Weizen (cherry flavoured).
As you'd imagine, they're all pretty horrible.
Krystall Weizen
- this is a Hefe-less version. I think it's the same, except they've filtered all the yeast out of it. This is probably a good thing. Comes with a slice of lemon for some reason...
"Ein Krystall (Weizen), bitte"
Pils
- you know what this is. There are millions of different versions, bottled and draught. Chances are if you ask for a pils (ein Pils, bitte) they'll turn 'round and say: "Vom Fass oder Flasche?" Which means, from the barrel or bottle? You pick one and then you'll probably get a list of pils, "Hofmeister, Jever, CD, Becks?" You pick one of these (except Jever). Then, next time you go in the same place you can simply say, "Eine Flasche Becks", or whatever, thus cutting out all that nonsense.
Berliner Weisse
- unsurprisingly, originated in Berlin. They are light, flavoured beers, and come in two varieties:
- Rot (red) : "Ein Berliner Rot"
- Grün (green) : "Ein Berliner Grün"
Tasty, but you could only ever have a couple, and you normally get a straw, and they often get served in a big vase/bowl thing...
Well, that's about it for German beer. It will all get you very drunk, but remember: none of them will ever match up to a bottle of ice-cold dog. Prost!Keith.